A Better Way to Compete

When I hear an idea from divergent sources within a few days, I consider it a sign that I might need to think about it. The first time I heard it involved Simone Biles’s competition at the Olympic trials. In case you have not heard anything about gymnastics in recent years, she leads the competition to the point that only second place and below is in question. A commentator said that Simone competed only with herself, striving to make each performance better than her last since it was a foregone conclusion that she would be first.

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Oddly, the next time I heard the idea was last weekend’s swim meet in a barnlike building in Laurel, Mississippi with young swimmers at the very beginning of their competitive careers. Because of Covid restrictions, this was my first time to be allowed to go and cheer on my eight-year-old grandson. Knowing that by nature I am a competitive person, his parents gave me a few instructions. We don’t concentrate on winning and losing, they said, but on how much Benjamin has improved his own times.  

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Now that put a new light on competing for this person who loves winning. What fun is there when you aren’t putting in an effort to come in first? I have never let either a child or grandchild win in any game I have played with them. When they pull off a win in a game with me, they know they have done it against my best effort.

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This new way of thinking seems healthy to me. Seeing the relaxed repartee between Benjamin and his dad between swims indicated joy instead of tension. I watched Benjamin in all five of his races. In the four races where he had a previous time, he bested his last time and we all celebrated. In his new race, he set a respectable starting point. It was all good.

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However, I had a small lapse. When Benjamin came in first in lane five, I couldn’t resist taking a picture of the scoreboard.